How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
