if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
i think i just lost a toe
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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