Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize