he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize