It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
