i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize