Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Randomize