literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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