Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
soo... how was my night?
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