totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize