When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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