you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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