I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize