Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize