cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
