NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Randomize