Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
