You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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