your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
