awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
