u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
