I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.