pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
