What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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