if you like me you must not know who I am
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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