i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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