have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
It's never too late to be topless.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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