wrigley field is MILF paradise
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
two words...techno handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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