so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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