Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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