yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
