Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Can you bring me the toilet please
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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