You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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