proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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