I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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