I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize