THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
