You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
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She bit a glass in half.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize