Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize