I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
