I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
