Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.

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(850): View more from Florida

I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity

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(936): View more from Texas

the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"

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(703): View more from Virginia

today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".

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(565): View more from

It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.

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(269): View more from Michigan

Strip club or gay bar tonight?

(989): View more from Michigan

I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?

(303): View more from Colorado

How about from a sixth floor window?

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