i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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