I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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