Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
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