Are we in a gay sports bar?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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