haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
