Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
