this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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