I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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