ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Randomize
