Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have surprise drugs for everyone
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize