90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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